'Would you like to be my friend?'

'Visualização Criativa' - 'Creative Visualization' by Elizabeth Mednicoff. Wonderful.

I would allow myself to be honestly happy.

Well, in my opinion the holidays by themselves are not depressive. This loving gold energy the Christ brings to the Planet on the 25th Dec, then the silver one Mother Mary brings on the 1st Jan and finally the cooper one brought by the Kings on the 6th Jan are just a balm for all of us to get 'reset' for the next year.

Guess what depresses most of us is the sudden reduction in the pace of life, which is necessary for us to get reloaded. Still this halt forces all of us to stop to think about life in general, but about family issues mainly which can be very heavy. Plus the expectaion/ anxiety about the next year, and, finally, the lack of light in some countries can contribute as stressing factors.

As my whole family does not exist any more, I spend the holidays alone. As this has already become 'normal' for me, got used to it and don't experience this as anything depressive. I do stop for a serious honest reflection, a retrospective of the year so I can leave it behind with a clean heart and mind, having present the points to be corrected ahead, which helps me skip the anxiety. And by this time of year we have super warm sunny days, so no problem concerning lack of light either.

Still the reduction of pace can stress me up so what keeps me away from this feeling is focusing in my reloading, doing it consciently, intensively, and keeping working, especially from spiritual point of view.

Metta

Hard to answer. Guess everything. We have a movie here called 'Terra em Transe'. That's exactly how my thoughts and feelings are today.

It's not much what I'll give them, but guess my presence, which is the best I have now to offer.

Recovering.

I strongly do not intend to live or even see the new year. I have been arranging everything and will commit suicide before it comes. These are my plans.

I would remind them of the net we live in, physically and spiritually, but mainly the spiritual one. Would remind them of all those who took care of them, educated them, defended them in different moments of their lives and how much they wish their happiness, how much they cheer for them. Then would let them enjoy the energy of their own memories 'cause it would definitely comfort and wake them up.

People say that we ourselves choose our names since our mothers' womb, and guess I agree with that.

My Christian name is Maria Beatriz. Maria is from Aramaic and means the Lady, generous and energic at the same time. And Beatriz is a Latin name that means the Blessed one, she who brings joy and happiness.

The important detail is that it is attributed to my family to have some Aramaic root - that noone of my parents were aware of, at least not at the moment I was born. And, Beatriz with 'z' is the Spanish spelling of the name, and I am a Brazilian, so speak Portuguese as mother language. Then, according to Mu tables, my last encarnation happened in Spain... huh, it makes me think and wonder.

Then, my Buddhist name. It was a fright or me when I received it. Pema Deva or the Goddess of Lotus. I wasn't expecting something like that but maybe like 'Lotus of Justice' or 'Lotus of Wisdom'.

Well, this is me. Nice to meet you.